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You know those moments when you feel like you’re coming completely unglued? Like you’re ready to just pull all your hair out? Like EVERYONE wants something, needs something, needs to talk, needs you to find something, needs a snack, needs homework done…. And all you can think about is going to hide in your bed from the entire world?

In the midst of a crazy life, you want to be awesome at everything. You want to be able to get all the homework done, the house picked up, the laundry done, time with your husband, time for yourself, time to workout, time to spend with Jesus, time to cook an amazing dinner.

The hard truth is keeping yourself in a cycle of constant work, stress, and anxiety puts your heart in a dangerous place. It’s so easy to feel unloved, unappreciated, and inadequate when we’re just so tired.

Life happens so fast, and before we know it our schedules are crazy and full. Right now, the very first thing you need on your schedule is rest. You need time, just for you, to do whatever it is that makes you feel rejuvenated.

As I’m writing this, I am literally sitting in a coffee shop at 8:30 pm, taking an evening of Sabbath because I felt exactly like that crazy version of myself not two hours ago. For me, spending time alone writing, reading, organizing, dreaming are all things that make me feel refreshed and ready to go again.

About a year ago, my husband and I completed a type of quiz that basically took the temperature of our marriage and life. His results said that life was FANTASTIC. Mine made me sound like I needed to be admitted.

We had some heavy discussions after that, but it mostly boiled down to this: I was taking on the world, and never stopping to rest. I was taking care of our three boys, of my husband, of our house, of myself (sorta) trying to create, trying to read. I needed time by myself in order to recharge, and at that point, it had been YEARS since I had dedicated a set amount of time to spend completely alone.

I allowed myself to feel guilty when I spent time away from my family. I felt guilty asking my husband to take care of the kids when he was working crazy amounts of hours. I felt guilty because we were both exhausted; maybe I should give him a break.

To be clear, he never gave me reason to feel that way. I put that on myself, and I know I am not alone in doing so. As women, we feel like we should be able to take care of everything. We feel guilty about needing help, needing rest, needing space to be nothing more than just ourselves.

At that point, Chris and I decided that once a week, I would leave the house, go to a coffee shop and spend time in rest. And y’all,  I come home feeling peaceful, relaxed, and a bit more free. I’m ready to love more, and give more. I feel like myself again.

I’m not perfect about going out every week. Honestly, it is a huge gift that I easily guilt myself out of asking for. Often, my husband notices I’m about to lose my mind and tells me to head out for the evening. I’m so thankful that he notices, but I’m working toward getting better about asking clearly for what I need.

To love God and live on purpose is a big task, one that many will never undertake. It’s a path that requires self-awareness, reflection, and the courage to make changes.

Here’s my point: If you want to be a woman who lives on purpose you must start by taking care of yourself, by taking a sabbath, and by not feeling guilty for doing so. 

What makes you feel refreshed? When are you going to go do that? Find a time and mark it on the calendar right now.